10 completely ridiculous things Oregonians Love to Complain About

oregonians

I can’t believe we’ve already lived in Oregon for a year! It seriously feels like we just moved here. After growing up in Texas and spending my college and post-college years in the Deep South. I can honestly say that I’ve never lived anywhere as special as Oregon. If you know much about Texans (and our intense state pride) you know that it is a pretty big deal for me to say that.

In general, Oregonians seem to be very “live and let live” and we’ve been nothing but embraced since moving here. Although I love Oregon there are some pretty crazy quirks that seem to apply to most native Oregonians. There’s not a whole lot to complain about when you live in such a cool place but Oregonians seem to have come up with a few complaints that I hear ALL the time.

1. How hot it is when the temperatures reach 75 degrees. In Texas, this is a perfect Spring day. And on the coast, if it’s hot and there’s no wind, watch out people will seriously lose it!

2. The “overabundance” of wild berries. I’ve legit heard people complain about the wild (and delicious) blackberries being “annoying weeds” and recommending that we kill the ones in our yard. Maybe one day I’ll understand this but for now I’ll be making lots and lots of blackberry pies every summer.

3. Fluoride in their water. There is quite the anti-fluoride movement in Portland and honestly I don’t think other states even think about this. We have fluoride free water on the coast and our dentist recommends we take a fluoride supplement. Go figure.

4. How bright it is on a sunny day. Oregonians are used to a cloud filter on their life so when it’s a gorgeous sunny day they get a little squeamish. They might never use an umbrella in the rain but a perfect sunny day warrants a parasol.

5. The rain. Oregonians act like they are hardcore and used to the rain but they complain about it just like the rest of us. To be honest it really doesn’t rain that much here. It might rain nearly every day but it rarely rains all day and hardly ever rains that hard. Honestly, I think Pacific Northwesterners play up the rain to keep people from moving here.

6. Plastic bags. Oregonians seem to fixate on certain environmental issues and plastic bags is one of their favorites. They have actually been outlawed in Portland and you can expect serious stink eye when you forget your reusable tote at the local co-op.

7. Non-local anything. ‘Buy local’ might as well be the Pledge of Allegiance around here. I’ve actually heard people complain about their local meat being from Seattle and therefore not local enough.

8. Invasive species. One of the first things I was “warned” about when I moved here was the Scotch Broom. People are seriously angry about this plant. I’ve been instructed: “if you see it, kill it.” It’s actually kind of beautiful but I would NEVER say that to an Oregonian. Exhibit A.

scotch broom

9. Californians. They are “taking over” Oregon and they drive like a bunch of crazies. Thank god I’m not from California and even if I were I’d probably lie about it to the locals. Californians are a great scapegoat for Oregon’s problems though.

10. Name brand adult beverages. Oregon is the land of microbreweries, local wineries and even niche liquor production. If you try to offer an Oregonian a Heineken they might slap you in the face.

All of these complaints are actually pretty endearing and I’d much rather hear someone bitch about blackberries than their black neighbors (cough cough Alabama). Oregon, you are such an open minded and accepting place and I love you for it. And to my Texan friends, please refer me back to this list when I start to assimilate. I hereby solemnly swear to never complain about a sunny 80 degrees summer day.

What are some funny things people complain about in your state that other states would scoff at?